First Time Patient in Japan

December 20, 2016

Before moving to Japan I worked as a nurse. I was always a nurse and never a patient (other than slicing my hand open as a kid and getting a few sutures). I knew it was going to be a challenge but I really had no idea what to expect as a patient in Japan. I was pretty nervous and like I explained in previous post, I was happy to find out Japan was a great place to have a baby. I prepped as best I could and looked high and low on the internet to find information on birth and what it was like to be a patient in Japan. Thankfully, a lot of what I read rang true to my experience. There were some pretty odd things but nothing that caught me off guard completely.

I'm going to start by saying that this is my own experience in one area of Japan in one hospital. I'm not claiming that this is how health care is all over Japan, just what it was like for me. Pre baby appointments were pretty similar to what I had done in the US. I had vitals, urine, labs and baby heartbeat checks. One thing I loved was that I got an ultrasound every time I went.  This was different than the US. It was great to see her and have that reassurance that she was OK in there. The language barrier was definitely a challenge but thankfully there was a receptionist who worked at one of the buildings that spoke English. We became friends and she came over to every one of my appointments and made sure I knew what was going on. My doctor spoke English but none of the other staff did. One thing that was really different was the wait time at appointments. I would normally go around 10 and not leave till 1-2. It was all first come first serve and sometimes the wait felt like forever. Thankfully I had nowhere to be and I’m sure I needed to work on my patience.

As an inpatient I seriously cannot say enough good things about my experience. The positives way outweighed the negatives. A lot of what I experienced was not because I was in a hospital but because I was in Japan.

Slippers are a big deal. This sounds silly but it's not. It's Japanese culture to wear house shoes or slippers indoors. This is not just for inside your house. It's also for buildings. And there are different ones for the bathroom. You generally leave your shoes at the door facing away from you and step up to a different surface. The hospital I went to had cubbies filled with slippers. You take a pair and then put your shoes in that spot. This sounds so simple right? Well after having a baby and feeling like I lost all my brain cells in the process. I can't tell you how many times I forgot to put my slippers on before walking out into the hall. Or forgot to put on my bathroom slippers and take my other ones off. I ended up sitting there looking down and realizing the bathroom ones where on the ground next to my feet still in my outside slippers.

Food is SO important. Meals were delivered three times a day and they were seriously good. Thankfully I didn’t have an appetite just the first day because the pressure was on to eat the entire tray. It was a lot of food and quite the challenge. Every time a nurse came in one of her questions was if I ate my entire tray. Good nutrition was talked about at every appointment as well as in a diet book I was given pre baby. Examples of meals were on posters all over the clinic. Nutrition was stressed as an essential part of healing. Overall I think I did OK with complying with this, however Mama wanted her Starbucks and I did have a bag of chocolate that sat by my bed because let's be real, hormones.

Visiting hours were very limited. Family was allowed in from 2-8. That includes the father of the baby. I talked to the staff before our admission and they were super accommodating and flexible with this issue. Japan is still very traditional in the process of birth with it being a time for the baby and the mom. The interpreter I had explained that this thought process is changing a bit and I even got a book about how important it was for husbands to be supportive and present. Sean stayed with me and they kindly put us in a double room our first admission so he had a bed. We really didn't have a problem during our stay, it didn’t even come up. Sean came and went as he wanted so that was awesome. Very sweet of them to bend the rules for us.

Medications for my entire stay were given to me after having Lucy. This was shocking but awesome. I got a little chart and a baggie of meds. I took them when I was supposed to and the nurse trusted me to do so. It was so nice to go hours without having the hospital staff needing to scan me and bring in meds. While I was in inpatient everything was done in the morning at 9 and at night at 7. Sometimes I would go all day without seeing anyone. I say this in a good way. I did have a call bell that I used a couple times and nurses were eager to help in any way possible. We communicated with an iPad and Google translate. It took some time but we never had a situation that we couldn't figure out. Thankfully birth is universal.  

Duration of stay is generally 5 days with a vaginal delivery and 7-10 with a C-section, depending on the mother and baby. To be honest, at first this sounded awful to me. Thankfully I found some blogs where woman explained that hospitals in Japan are generally not like hospitals in the US when having a baby. I would have to agree. I had a quiet private room where I could call for help at any time but had minimal interruptions, amazing meals delivered to my bedside, and a scheduled massage was a pretty great way to recover. Don't get me wrong, by day 5 I was ready to go home.  But overall I think it was a wonderful experience.

Baby stuff: OK so this was the hard part for me. Being a new mom I had an idea of how I wanted things. Supplementing with sugar water and formula is very common here. Especially before a moms milk comes in (in the States I was taught that a baby trying to nurse even with no milk yet would be what made a mom’s milk come in). So that part confused me. They explained that it was important for the mom to sleep heal and rest and the baby would prevent her from doing that if they were nursing all the time. We agreed to disagree on this one. This was the only thing that was kind of a bummer. It made me feel like I couldn't leave her in the nursery.  One time I did it was to shower and that was even hard. Then I left her there when I went down to get my last check before I left. When I came back she was crying and the nurse was getting a sugar bottle ready. Both times Sean had needed to step out to get paper work started for Lucy’s birth certificate and registration.

There was also a uniform they wanted Lucy in. I had a bag of goodies for Lucy that I was dying to put her in. After they checked her in the morning I would change her into her own clothes. And then at night before bed I put the yellow back on so she was in that for the morning check. It was silly I know but I didn't want to make waves and be that foreigner that had to be different. There were some silly things that didn't bother me like identifying her by writing my name on her leg, even though she and I both had a band.
Baths are a big deal culturally here. If you have never heard of public baths called onsen I would take a minute to look them up. The bath was a bit of a process but Lucy absolutely loved it and fell asleep she was so relaxed. The first day the nurse demonstrated bathing and bathing safety and the second day she observed Sean giving the bath to make sure we understood.

Overall Lucy and I both had a great experience. When we left all the staff came out to take pictures with us. I have gotten pretty used to being the only non-Japanese person in every room and forget sometimes how strange we must look. I noticed when we went back that the pictures we took are now on the staff board at the clinic for all to see J














I Had a Baby in Japan

December 02, 2016

I’m back! I can’t wait to catch up on blogging after so much time off. I thought I would start by sharing my birth story. Sean and I spent some time writing it all down a couple of days after Lucy came into the world. I am so glad that we did because the details are already a bit blurry. I plan on writing another blog soon about the hospital stay and what I experienced being a patient in Japan.

As you may know my due date came and went. My doctor said he would let me go 1 week over so we scheduled an induction for a week past my due date. We went in ready to have a baby and super excited. I’m not going to go into a ton of detail explaining what happened that weekend. Pretty much I was started on Pitocin and labor never progressed. Pitocin was turned off at night and we slept to start the process again the next day. I got up to the highest doses and still nothing really happened. 

This is what I mean by did not progress – I was having mild random cramps, like contractions, but my cervix had no changes. So we needed a new plan and after talking to our Doctor, he decided on the next course of action. Thankfully, Lucy didn’t have any issues with her heart rate and was happy to be in there. Our doctor checked me and everything was good. He also took an x-ray to make sure the baby had room to grow another week. All of these things were reassuring that she was safe to be inside another week. Waiting was our only option other than having a cesarean. Weighing the risks for Lucy we decided that everything was telling us she was safe inside for another week. We would go home and prayed for labor to spontaneously start that week. I went to the hospital every day to have Lucy monitored.

We were devastated when we left the hospital without a baby. When we were driving we realized how wrong we were in thinking that. We were leaving the hospital WITH a baby. A baby that was safe inside. I had to check myself. Yes I was sad and it was OK that I was upset. But some people have to actually leave without their baby. A truly heartbreaking reality that no parent should ever have to live through. We were so thankful to be given another week and that Lucy was healthy and strong. That week was one of the hardest of my life. Daily I fought the fear of something happening to her in there because she was overdue. Thankfully, our appointments went well and the week passed.

A couple days shy of 42 weeks we went in to be induced. At 8:30am I was 3cm dilated. I was pretty excited when my doctor said that. I had contractions and bleeding the day and night before but wasn’t convinced they did anything. We got admitted and had Pitocin started around 10-10:30am. Around noon we ate lunch (yes you can eat while in labor here, it’s actually encouraged here to get your strength up) and I was having weak contractions. It sounds like a joke but for over a week we were praying for pain, praying for labor to start. You can imagine how happy I was around 1-2pm when I started having stronger painful contractions. It was such a strange experience to praise God for pain. By 5pm I was having strong contractions ever 5-7 min. At that point we had not gone up past the starting dose on the Pitocin. Our Doctor decided my body was doing it on its own and we turned it off at 5:30pm. I was 5cm and thankfully I continued to progress without Pitocin. My contractions continued and at 10:00pm I was 8cm. Talk about motivation. I loved hearing that I was 8cm and remember asking her a few times if she really meant 8, because of the language barrier I wanted to be clear. We labored for another two hours and at midnight I was 9cm! (My water still had not broken)

OK so this next part is where things got a bit strange. The midwife (At the hospital I delivered the “nurses” were certified in delivering babies and I realized toward the end that they were actually in roles similar to what a midwife does in the US). At midnight my pain was pretty extreme with my contractions coming every two minutes. We thought we were almost done and although it was intense I focused on meeting her in just a short time. The midwife told me to let her know when I felt the “urge” because she was coming soon. Over the next two hours nothing changed. I didn’t “feel” anything different. Just the strong contractions every 2-3 minutes that reminded me labor is a curse from God. At 2-230am I was so over it. I was sick of her asking me about the urge and finally just told her I wanted to push. In my head there was NO way I went another two hours without dilating that last cm. We made our way down the hall to the delivery space (OR room). From that point I remember getting up on the bed and watching everyone setting up the room. I HATED being in bed and kept my eyes closed trying to get through the contractions. I remember the midwife asking me to relax and try to rest.

I continued to keep my eyes closed and tried my best to relax. About 45minuets to an hour later I opened my eyes. The staff was gone, the room was dimly lit and Sean was by my side with his head down sleeping. You can imagine, I was extremely confused and disoriented. I woke him up and asked what was going on. He explained that I had fallen asleep and my contractions spaced to 15-20 minuets apart. WHAT?! I had NEVER heard of anything like that happening and I pretty much lost it at that point. It was now around 4am and last I knew I was going to push my baby out. The midwife came back in and explained that my body needed rest and I should try to sleep again. I thought she was joking, I couldn’t believe what was happening and thought I was going to lose my mind. There was NO WAY I was going to be able to sleep again and I got out of bed and started pacing and moving as much as I could. With being up the contractions picked back up and were 4-5 min apart. Around 6 we were exhausted and barley able to hold it together. We called her back in and asked her to check me. I WAS STILL 9cm 6 hours after being told I was 9. I knew I wasn’t going to last much longer mentally or physically at that point and asked what we could do. The midwife told me I couldn’t push until I was 10cm and I also needed contractions to be closer together. She called the Doctor at that point and it was decided that we would restart low dose Pitocin. With the Pitocin my contractions picked back up and took about 45 min to get back to being strong and 2-3 minutes apart. I got checked and my water broke. I was FINALLY 10cm and ready to push. I pushed twice on my side then flipped onto my back. After what we guessed to be 8 pushes Lucy was finally being put in my arms.

Overall it was an amazing experience and I cannot be more thankful for the medical team that took care of us. Everyone was EXTREMLY patient and willing to let my body take its time to do what it needed to do. I was really impressed with the care we received. Shout out to my husband. He was by my side through it all and I could not have asked for a better supporter. Also for family and my bestie who all anxiously waited and blew up our phones with support.
































Lucy Mei Kelley 
Born in Japan at 8:17 am on November 6th 
19 inches long weighing 7lbs 14oz


Be Still and Know

October 13, 2016

“Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10


I am someone who feels emotion very deeply. I normally can’t help the intensity of what I am feeling. As a nurse I learned how to compartmentalize the deepest of emotions in order to function effectively and efficiently in my job.


When it comes to the ones I love the deepest, my husband, family and dearest friends, I don’t have this mechanism. When people I love are hurting or walking through a hard time it breaks me. I franticly scramble trying to think of anything I can possibly do to help the situation. Normally I do this by my actions. By driving to them and being with them. Taking them comfort in forms of gifts or food. Checking in on them to keep up with the struggles of those hardest moments.


I knew Japan would have its challenges but I can honestly say I underestimated. In the short two months we have been here so much has happened back home. Heartache, joy in the welcoming of new life, new challenges and jobs, excitement of adding love through adoption, sickness and confusion. All things that I long to be present in. I want to walk near the ones I love. Not being there in person for the highs and the lows has left me feeling more helpless than I could have ever anticipated.


Silence and solitude used to be something I coveted. Words that sounded so peaceful and welcoming. But when you’re truly quiet you see yourself. The good the bad and the ugly. Being left alone with your own thoughts every day is eye opening. It is extremely humbling to accept that there is truly nothing that I can do to fix things for the people I love. Bad things and good things happen. Life happens. It has been a grueling process as I have slowly let go of the control that I thought I had.


I have learned that in life I tend to let the problem that is right in front of me be the biggest thing in the world to me. I thought I could control my own peace by trying to calm storms. In contrast, my husband is a big picture person and my rock...


It’s pretty uncomfortable to feel like I need God. I need the peace that He gives me when I can’t actively love my people and stay busy. I have learned is that there is really nothing to be afraid of. I know that God is faithful and that no matter the highs and lows he has been there through the ages and seen much more.


I don’t know why we are here in this season of change. I do know that I have seen myself in a new light and understand more of who God is. At the end of the day that’s enough for me.

Having a baby in Japan – Mama post #2

October 04, 2016

I will start by saying I have had wonderful prenatal care here in Japan. My appointments have been frequent and thorough. I have an English speaking Doctor and an interpreter that is at all of my appointments just in case. My best friend was six weeks ahead of me with her pregnancy and my precious sister is 7 weeks behind me. It’s been wonderful to have woman so close that I can compare experiences with. It’s honestly been one of the most comforting things during this process. Everything as far as prenatal care that we compare has been nearly identical to the U.S. There are however MANY cultural differences that I will mention. There are also many different practices during labor and during postnatal care.

When we found out we were pregnant and moving to Japan I began my research. There was limited information and I had to do some major digging. I found a lot of my information on vlogs and blogs from woman who were pregnant in Japan or gave birth in Japan. During my research I also found that maternal and infant mortality rates are among the lowest in Japan. This makes Japan one of the safest places in the world to have a baby. Finding out how safe Japan was to have a baby and also an English speaking MD were two big answers to prayer. I felt more peaceful about having a baby here than I could have ever anticipated. OK so here is my PRE baby list of the things that are different here in Japan.

1. It is believed that the temperature of your feet directly effects the warmth of your baby. This is NOT something that my doctor told me. I was convinced that this was ridiculous and I wouldn’t run into that opinion. I was wrong. When we got here it was the end of Japan's extremely hot and humid summer. I had a hard time getting dressed. I would strategize on wearing as little as possible but still being covered enough for the modest culture. The last thing I wanted to do was bend over and put socks on. So I slipped on my Birkenstocks and out the door I went. No lie, I have had woman talk to me about this in both public and social settings. Being the only non-Japanese person in pretty much every setting, one becomes aware of other people. I don’t think that this is a bad thing, it’s important to respect the people around you and be aware of cultural behaviors. When I was doing everything I could to stand out as little as possible it was a bit discouraging for the cashier to ask me if my baby was cold because my feet were cold. At the end of the day this is one thing where I choose comfort over cultural expectations.

2. There is always a place to sit everywhere you go. In Japan, when you are pregnant, you are grouped in with the elderly, injured and handicapped population. It sounds a little rough at first but it’s actually awesome. People are always extremely helpful and want to make sure you’re OK. There are designated parking spots and seating at most places. This was honestly a little awkward for me at first. I’m stubborn and I didn’t want people to feel like they had to move for me or go out of their way to help me. After a while I realized it was just a way for people to show that they care. One thing I love about the Japanese culture is how community focused behavior is. For the most part people want to do what’s best for other people. It really is a beautiful thing.

3. Weight gain and strict diet. OK, so this one is a little bit of a touchy subject for pregnant woman. In the U.S. people come in all shapes and sizes. There is such a vast variety that doctors evaluate what is right for the individual patient. Here in Japan prenatal care is very standardized. Most woman have the same body type and weight gain recommendations are pretty strict. Diet is also strict and woman are given a specific list of what to eat and what not to eat. This is THE biggest issue for foreign mothers according to past surveys taken. I am not going to go into too much detail but I did want to mention this. The recommended weight gain for pregnant woman in Japan is 7-8kg, that’s 15-18lbs. This might be shocking to most people. I know it was for me. My doctor in the U.S. recommended that I gain 30-35 pounds. Honestly my doctor here didn’t even mention weight to me once. I think I was a bit of a different situation because I came toward the end of my pregnancy.

4. The last thing I want to talk about is registration. I mentioned this in a previous post. When you find out you are pregnant in Japan you have to register with the town office. You get a TON of information, a discount card, coupon book and many other things. The coupon book contains a coupon for every appointment that you will need to go to. You simply hand them the book they take a coupon and you are not charged. This was so surprising for Sean and I after spending hundreds in U.S. prenatal appointment hospital bills.

So far I would have to say our experience being pregnant here in Japan has been pretty great. I hope this was an interesting read and as always, let me know if you have any questions. I do plan on giving some details about the birth and our hospital stay after baby girl makes her appearance. I’m sure there will be a lot about our hospital experience that is much different than the U.S.



So much to see

September 26, 2016

Sorry I haven’t written a post in a bit. We have just been doing life day to day here in Japan. Baby girl is 36 weeks and I have a routine doctor’s appointment tomorrow to see her :) Everything is pretty much set for her to arrive. It’s getting real and the excitement is building by the day! 

The last few weeks it’s rained pretty much nonstop. September weather in Tottori is known to be overcast HUMID and rainy. We have tried to make the best of it and use the clear days to get out and sightsee. I am absolutely amazed by the beauty that surrounds us. We are a short distance from the beach, Mt. Daisen, a gorgeous flower park and famous castle. I added a map of the area we live so that you have an idea of where things are from our house. On the map you can see our town called Hoki marked below Yonago City.



Matsue Castle – Located in Matsue a five tiered castle built by Horio Yoshiharu & one of Japan's few remaining original feudal castles. The magnificence of castles in Japan is hard to put into words. Climbing the steps up to the castle is always an incredible feeling.












Mount Daisen (Marked on the map) - a volcanic mountain located in the Tottori Prefecture. It is the highest in the Chugoku region with an elevation of 1,709 meters. It is a designated national park of Japan for its magnificent landscape. Mt. Daisen also has been chosen as one of the third greatest summits in Japan. We drove up and parked half way up. Because it was overcast the views weren’t the best but the area was still gorgeous.
















 Hanakairo Flower Park – A major flower park in Japan with a gorgeous view of Mt. Daisen. Loved this place! We had some pear flavored ice-cream and walked the winding paths. We will definitely be making trips back during different seasons to see the flowers that are growing at that time. 


































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