Wedding date night!
August 14, 2017
This past Friday we went to our first Japanese wedding. I
was giddy the day Sean came home and told me we were going to be getting and
invitation. Then, I felt a sense of panic thinking about leaving Lucy for that
long. After we asked a good friend to watch Lucy I was able to relax and look
forward to a much needed date night with the hubs. I love weddings and I think
they make for one of the best dates! There is something so special about
witnessing the joining of two lives. The commitment being displayed and vowed
for a lifetime is felt by everyone in the room.
As always I did some reading to try to prep for what to
expect, how to dress, what amount of money to give, excreta. I’m thankful I did
my research because it went very smoothly and we had a great time. Believe it
or not I do not like being put in new uncertain situations. Honestly, I was
shocked at how “western” the wedding was. There were many similarities and I
didn’t feel like it was overall too different from something you could find in
the America. I say this taking into consideration that American weddings are
all so very different these days. People pick and choose the traditions that
they want to incorporate into their special day. Pretty much anything goes as
long as it is what the couple wants. I think because of this mind set I wasn’t
too thrown off by attending a Japanese wedding. There were however some strange
and just different things that I am going to try to explain for you.
Dress code: This sounds silly but believe me, it’s not. When
everyone in a room is dressed the same way you care about dress code. I read in
a few places on line that it was important for woman to cover their shoulders.
This isn’t surprising because of how modest the Japanese culture is in general.
I also read that most woman wear a shawl over a dark colored dress. This is often accompanied by a small amount of delicate jewelry, preferably pearls. Shoes should be a neutral
color small kitten heal or flats. This information was spot on and I was so thankful
that I followed suit. Its sounds specific and a bit overkill but this was
exactly what every woman in the room wore other than the woman dressed in kimono.
Men wore black suits with a white or blue undershirt and plain tie.
No dancing: Again, some American weddings may not have
dancing but I wouldn’t say that’s the norm. In Japan there is no dancing or
room made for a dance floor. There is an announcer that runs the program and
talks everyone through what is happening and what will come next.
Weddings games: People were very excited to participate in
game-show style games throughout the reception. The announcer cued the curtains
to close and lights to dim as a big screen lowered at the end of the room.
Everyone cheered and clapped in response participating enthusiastically to the different
games that were played.
Clothing changes: The bride and groom changed three times.
All changes were full head to toe. The first style was western, a traditional
white dress and black tux. The second was what you would imagine when you think
of an elaborate senior prom. A blue floral dress with the groom in a matching
blue suit. The third change was my favorite, a traditional Japanese look. Each
change was announced and music was played as the couple was escorted out of the
room by different family members.
Gifts: When attending a wedding its custom for a guest to
give at least 300,00 yen (~300 US$). The money is put into a fancy money envelope and given the
greater when you walk in to the venue. Each guest attending the event received
a huge goodie-bag full of gifts. One of the gifts was a catalog that allowed us to select a gift and send for it to be shipped to our house.
Pouring drinks: This is a cool tradition that is hard to
remember at times. You’re not supposed to pour your own drink. People would
even come over to our table to say hi and pour drinks for us. It’s a cool way
to serve each other and make sure everyone is cared for a having a good time. The
groom’s buddies made a game of it and all ran to fill his drink every time he
took a sip.
Lucy did great with our friend Kayo and loved playing with her boys. It was helpful to get picture updates while we were away. I think I have some separation anxiety for sure. I'm thankful for a husband who gently reminds me its OK to take time away from her. What an awesome experience! We had a great time!
Lucy did great with our friend Kayo and loved playing with her boys. It was helpful to get picture updates while we were away. I think I have some separation anxiety for sure. I'm thankful for a husband who gently reminds me its OK to take time away from her. What an awesome experience! We had a great time!
Us with the bride and groom when they took pictures with our table
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